Not that I was big on lecturing, but it seems to make so much sense as a parent to tell your kid what s/he did wrong, why I'm upset, etc. I'm learning to let it go (for the most part). The day after learning this, my son had stepped on something accidentally and partially breaking it. He told me what he had done and seemed sorry about it. Instead of a "well, maybe you'll watch where you're going next time!" or "Be more careful!", I responded with a hug (Love & Logic is big on empathy). He already told me what he did. He expressed remorse. He already did what I thought was my job. I didn't need to rub salt in the wound. Of course, later, I stepped on the same object and completely destroyed it. I would have been pretty annoyed to be told "Watch where you're going!" "You need to be more careful!" Frankly, if someone told me that, the last thing I would want to do is be more careful and watch where I'm going! How strange.
Yesterday, my son was pouring himself a glass of juice. He spilled a little. "Uh oh. I spilled some juice, Mommy." "Oh." "I need to clean it up." "What will you use to clean it?" "I need a towel, please." Yeah, he gets it. :)
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| No sense in lecturing! |
